Add this exercise to your list of bedtime readings (perhaps one topic each night).
Parent to child: "Tonight we're going to talk about the subject of responsibility—
- You're walking home from school with your friend. You both are throwing rocks at signs when he throws one that misses the sign and hits a car which scares the driver who swerves and smashes into a tree. The driver calls the police. The repair shop says it will cost $4,000.00 to fix. Who pays for the damages? Your friend? You? You and your friend? Your parent(s)? or both sets of parents?
- You’re sitting at your desk and the student behind you slaps you on the head; you react immediately by turning and slapping him. The teacher watched the entire incident. Who should the teacher punish, You? Him? or You and him?
- Your father yells angrily at your mother and slams the door as he leaves the house. When he returns you don’t hear either your mother or your father acknowledge the abuse in front of you. I.e. Father to mom: "I know my yelling at you this morning didn't feel good to you or our son; I know it was abusive." Father to son: "I know my yelling at mom this morning didn't feel good to her or to you; I know that it was abusive." Should you say something or not? Would your non-verbal communications about the incident have an effect?
- You hear your mother and father arguing and swearing at each other. Who started the argument? Who usually starts the arguments between them?
- Your mother asks, “Did you brush your teeth? You lie and say yes and she believes you. Is there a consequence for the lie? Does “God” punish you? Do you punish you? If you had to punish you what would be an appropriate consequence?
- Your friend tells you his 14-yr-old sister sneaks out at night to see a boyfriend and makes you promise to not tell anyone. What do you do or say?