This tip is primarily for teens.
This subject adds to your high school speech-communication curriculum—a direct experience of personal responsibility. Specifically, it's about your non-verbal communications and the effects they have on your class-mates/friends. It's one of those learning experiences, a fork in the road, after which you'll no longer be able to say you didn't know.*
For example: All the students at Columbine High School, that experienced the shooting rage of two students, were force to acknowledged later (during police investigations and counseling sessions) that they observed the anti-social behavior of the boys and condoned their behaviors non-verbally. They may have even "talked" about the boy's strange behaviors behind their backs, but as they discovered, talking causes a problem to persist. None of the students, nor any of the teachers, had been aware of the difference between talking and communicating. Specifically, when communication takes place problems are resolved.
Here's a communication exercise:
Question #1: Who in your school is most likely to eventually end up in jail or might even kill someone?
Question #2: Would you be willing to tell them you have this thought, this premonition?
Most agree that the answer to question #2 is, "Of course not!" They might kill you, right?
This decision, to remain silent, to not prevent a possible/potential crime leaves us feeling badly. Yes? That's our integrity kicking in. Once we've been made aware of our ability to effect change, and we remain silent, then we become responsible for the outcomes.
Solution: Who would you be willing to talk to about a student's anti-social, angry countenance and your premonition? A friend, a teacher, a parent? Perhaps no one. Maybe you'll just stop reading this and put the subject to the back of your mind. Not to worry, communicating your considerations about the student non-verbally will of course have consequences (for you, the student, and possibly many others). Yikes! I don't want to be that powerful, that responsible; not to worry, most everyone needs to deny responsibility (so as to observe the effects of voting non-verbally) en route to becoming an effective positive**leader.
The leadership-communication skills it takes to effectively address a student's presentation, their sullen angry act,*** are the same skills it takes to have ever-expanding joyous relationships with everyone.
* Think of this tip as a gift from the students at Columbine.
** The student is crying out for help. He/she is non-verbally dramatizing the fact that they are not in communication with anyone. Their relationship with their parents is fraught with communication breakdowns. They haven't warmly hugged one, or both of them, for a long time.There's no one with whom the student can be completely open, honest, and spontaneous, zero significant thoughts withheld.
*** Positive leader. One cannot not lead. One is always affecting all outcomes. Some people use their leadership-communication skills to thwart and upset others, and others cause mediocrity around them.
last edited 12/30/17