FAQs

There are two lists of questions.

1) Questions about the Tutorial and Support Group with answers.
 
2) Questions registered participants may ask.

Questions

Questions about the tutorial and support group:

How long does it take to do the Tutorial part of the process?

What's the Support Group part of the process about?

How long does the Support Group part of the process last?

Can I do the Tutorial-Support Group even though I am already in a relationship?

Can I do the Tutorial-Support Group if I am looking for someone my own sex?

What happens if I start and quit?

What's the maximum number of participants in a support group?

What is the philosophy?

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addressed
 

Questions registered participants may ask:  (sample questions)

Note: There are no correct answers to these types of questions. It's the conversations about these topics that make a difference. That is to say, we were supposed to have had these kinds of conversations with our parents at various ages while growing up. That we didn't suggests that we are incomplete. The Support Group supports one in being whole and complete.

Is it possible to have a relationship in which there is open, honest, and spontaneous communication, zero thoughts withheld from each other?

Do I approach first or should I wait and let them make the first move?

Is my integrity such that I will attract a person who is whole and complete or am I projecting something that will attract someone to give me yet another lesson in preparation for my ideal? How can I know?

How do I formulate the intention to have what I say I want without having to do any of the leg work? I don't like to project that I'm a pathetic lonely person, so much so that I have refined a self-sufficient aura (characterized by an on-purpose, eyes forward swiftness). It might come across as unfriendliness.

I don't know the rules. Eye-contact, look away, be super friendly, be somewhat aloof, what age group should I be looking at—what age looks like I'm a letch? How many smiles do I give another without a positive sign before I just give up on them? etc. etc.

Is it possible to complete my pattern of attracting those who are not healthy for me? If so, how long will it take and what must I do?

Is there a way to know now, whether I intend to have a mate or will I only know five years from now? Do I even have a choice or is it a matter of fate?

Am I intending to create, have, and sustain, a magnificent relationship or am I lying to myself? Is there a way to know what my intentions are?

When do I reveal that I have been in an abusive relationship or that I have a health/physical condition that they should know about?

Just how do I go about explaining a terrible previous relationship without badmouthing? It seems that no matter how I tell the story my new partner will end up not liking my previous partner without even meeting them

What (and when) do I say if I am estranged from my parents? (reasons for estrangement might be, mentally/socially dysfunctional, alcohol/drug addicts, abusive, involved in illegal activities)

How can I tell if what another tells me is the truth?

What are the effects of dumping my dysfunctional family on the one I say I love? Is there a way to not have to submit my intended to the abusive communications of my family members?

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Questions about the Tutorial and Support Group:

about

What's the Support Group part of the process about?

The Support Group part of the process is an opportunity to see what it would be like to make a commitment to participate for two, or more months or until you have manifested your ideal partner.

The Support Group part of the process means that you would post your two-week goals* on the Support Group Forum and engage in conversations with the coach in support of you reaching your goals.

By participating in the Support Group you will eventually learn how to support others. It's a great way to become clear about the differences  between nagging and supporting, between trying to change someone and supporting them in their intentions. The difference is the results. Support always always works.

The vast majority of arguments between partners are because each is stuck in the adversarial communication model, each unconsciously trying to change/thwart the other.  The overweight partner has yet to formulate the intention to be supported (evidenced by the results) and the nagger has yet to discover that their partner has no choice but mirror their (the nagger's) leadership-communication model.

Participation in the Support Group process is a great way to cut down on procrastination. The process keeps you in a relatively complete state of acknowledgment.

If the next few months are critical for you, if everything depends on you functioning at your best, then it's no accident that you are presently reading this.

*things to do every two weeks

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long

How long does it take to do the Tutorial part of the process?

The Tutorial part of the process is a series of conversations that stem from reading a topic. There are eight topics (four required and four optional). Each topic takes less than ten minutes to read. You are asked to share your thoughts with the coach on the Support Group Forum after reading a topic.

From your reply the coach provides feedback about your communication model, how you communicate, how you come across.

Each person's communication model produces certain predictable results (love and harmony, or arguing and covert disrespect or thwarting condescension, verbal or even physical abuse).

Conversations about the effects your leadership-communication model have on others begins to give you choices.  These conversations can take several postings on the forum, some conversations, exchanges between you and the coach can last weeks and longer. Some conversations require that you take a recess and observe yourself.

The answer? It's best to allow the full 30 days with three or four (or more) posts per week.

Tip: Stay in communication with another as long as the conversations are mutually supportive. 

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sg

How long does the Support Group part of the process last?

Your original registration gives you the username and password to the Tutorial and 30 days of Support Group (SG) participation. During that time you may use the Support Group Forum however you wish.

After 30 days you may re-register for one or more months.

There is no requirement to play the two-week goal game (posting things you intend to have done within two weeks) in which case you would use the Support Group Forum solely for conversations with the coach in support of manifesting your ideal partner.

As you participate in the SG it will occur to you that you could start your own SG within your own social circle. You are free to use the SG model or to modify it if you wish. One thing I've noticed is that the majority of participants who start their own support group do so before they have mastered the fundamentals of leadership. To make their group more enticing most modify the rules so as to make it a bit easier. "Your mileage may vary" as the saying goes. One way to know you're ready to start your own SG is when a support group coach tells you, "You're ready to lead, to manage." in which case you'd enroll in another type of support group consisting solely of support group facilitators.

One nice benefit of having a full-time support group/life coach:

Ninety-nine percent of the time a client reads a business letter to me, together we edit it in some fashion. Afterwards we are clear that had we sent the original it might have caused upset, confusion, or less than desirable results. And, I run all of my important correspondence past friends. Two minds are most always more conscious than one. A support group coach is; having your own personal secretary, mentor, advisor, true friend, cheerleader, acknowledger/clearer, available 27/7.

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can

Can I do the tutorial-support group even though I am already in a relationship?

Yes. Assuming of course you have communicated verbally to your partner that you are still looking.

Delivering the "You're not my number ten" communication up front is an excellent way to create a magnificent relationship. It creates space for other uncomfortable truths to be shared.

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sex

Can I do the Tutorial-Support Group if I am looking for someone my own sex?

Absolutely yes. You have to be willing to identify your sex and preferences to the coach otherwise it would be impossible for you to communicate spontaneously—you'd have to keep part of your mind on hiding (deceit) and gender nouns etc. Also, if you have not already, you would be supported in "coming out." First to your family, then your close friends, so that we could be certain that thwartings and communication breakdowns were not the consequences of deceptions. To "come out" we'd first address the source of your fear. Then we'd design communication scenarios for each person.

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quit

What happens if I start and quit?

If you start and quit for any reason life will continue to work as it's supposed to. Each of us have different paths. No matter what path you choose it will ultimately work for you—it always has worked perfectly and it always will. Whether you are enlightened, have been enlightened and are not now, or searching for enlightenment, this process is merely a game to play. If your intention is to have this process work it will work. The coach serves as a guide for those who enjoy the unique conversations and speed of traveling with guides. Many participants take one or two-year vacations and process what they get through coaching and then return.

Note: Participants are asked to agree to reply (to answer or at least acknowledge receipt) to the coach's posts/questions within 72 hours. If you think it might take you longer or that you are planning a long weekend, then let the coach know by-when not later than (NLT) you will post a complete reply.

If you start and decide to take a week or longer recess then we say that whatever came up for you was a positive effect of the tutorial and our conversations. When you come back you will have to re-register for another 30 days.

Refund Policy: There are no refunds except in the case of an emergency (described as a sudden unexpected event requiring immediate attention), such as hospitalization, the death of a family member, or if you are fired. In which case you will receive a full refund minus a $20 administration processing fee.

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max

What's the maximum number of participants in a support group?

Registrations close temporarily when there are 10 active participants. This affords sufficient personal attention and timely replies.

Note: Participants may read and reply to each others posts if they wish.

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philosophy

What is the philosophy?

The philosophy supports personal responsibility—open, honest, and spontaneous communication, keeping ones agreements and telling the truth. This is sometimes referred to as "operating from impeccable integrity." The communication model used supports communicating through to mutual satisfaction. "I think you're ugly" may be one's truth but for most it would not feel good to hear, except by request with express permission.

The education process is referred to as Discovery Learning. The premise being, you already know the content of the tutorial. The tutorial merely brings (and keeps) what you know to the front of your mind at a time when you are intent of having truths work. The tutorial also examines beliefs and understandings held to be truths which are not.

The process is not therapeutic; it's not about getting better or analyzing behaviors. The process is educational, and, you may find yourself feeling as though you're "getting better."

The process is non denominational and non secular; however the experience of communication, of being gotten and acknowledged, is described by most as a spiritual experience.

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