FAQs

There are two lists of questions.

1) Questions about the Tutorial.
 
2) Questions registered participants may ask.

Questions

Questions about the tutorial

How long does it take to do the Tutorial?

Can I do the Tutorial even though I am already in a relationship?

Can I do the Tutorial if I am looking for someone my own sex?

What happens if I start and quit?

What is the philosophy?

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addressed  

Questions registered participants may ask:  (sample questions)

Note: There are no correct answers to these types of questions. It's the conversations about these topics that make a difference. That is to say, we were supposed to have had these kinds of conversations with our parents at various ages while growing up. That we didn't suggests that we are incomplete. The Support Group supports one in being whole and complete.

Is it possible to have a relationship in which there is open, honest, and spontaneous communication, zero thoughts withheld from each other?

Do I approach first or should I wait and let them make the first move?

Is my integrity such that I will attract a person who is whole and complete or am I projecting something that will attract someone to give me yet another lesson in preparation for my ideal? How can I know?

How do I formulate the intention to have what I say I want without having to do any of the leg work? I don't like to project that I'm a pathetic lonely person, so much so that I have refined a self-sufficient aura (characterized by an on-purpose, eyes forward swiftness). It might come across as unfriendliness.

I don't know the rules. Eye-contact, look away, be super friendly, be somewhat aloof, what age group should I be looking at—what age looks like I'm a letch? How many smiles do I give another without a positive sign before I just give up on them? etc. etc.

Is it possible to complete my pattern of attracting those who are not healthy for me? If so, how long will it take and what must I do?

Is there a way to know now, whether I intend to have a mate or will I only know five years from now? Do I even have a choice or is it a matter of fate?

Am I intending to create, have, and sustain, a magnificent relationship or am I lying to myself? Is there a way to know what my intentions are?

When do I reveal that I have been in an abusive relationship or that I have a health/physical condition that a potential new partner should know about?

Just how do I go about explaining a terrible previous relationship without badmouthing? It seems that no matter how I tell the story my new partner will end up not liking my previous partner without even meeting them

What (and when) do I say if I am estranged from my parents? (reasons for estrangement might be, mentally/socially dysfunctional, alcohol/drug addicts, abusive, involved in illegal activities)

How can I tell if what another tells me is the truth?

What are the effects of dumping my dysfunctional family on the one I say I love? Is there a way to not have to submit my intended to the abusive communications of my family members?

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Questions about the Tutorial:

It takes about 30 minutes to read. However it takes a while to compose and post a question and wait for the coach's reply (seldom longer than 72 hours).

The material is designed to stimulate conversations between you and the coach. There is no outside reading required.

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can

Can I do the tutorial even though I am already in a relationship?

Yes. Assuming of course you have communicated verbally to your partner that you are still looking.

Delivering the "You're not my number ten" communication up front is an excellent way to create a magnificent relationship. It creates space for other uncomfortable truths to be shared.

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sex

Can I do the Tutorial if I am looking for someone my own sex?

Absolutely yes. You have to be willing to identify your sex and preferences to the coach otherwise it would be impossible for you to communicate spontaneously—you'd have to keep part of your mind on hiding (deceit) and gender nouns etc. Also, if you have not already, you would be supported in "coming out." First to your family, then your close friends, so that we could be certain that thwartings and communication breakdowns were not the consequences of deceptions. To "come out" we'd first address the source of your fear. Then we'd design communication scenarios for each person.

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quit

What happens if I start and quit?

If you start and quit for any reason life will continue to work as it's supposed to. Each of us have different paths. No matter what path you choose it will ultimately work for you—it always has worked perfectly and it always will. Whether you are enlightened, have been enlightened and are not now, or searching for enlightenment, this process is merely a game to play. If your intention is to have this process work it will work. The coach serves as a guide for those who enjoy the unique conversations and speed of traveling with guides. Many participants take one or two-year vacations and process what they get through coaching and then return.

Note: Participants are asked to agree to reply (to answer or at least acknowledge receipt) to the coach's posts/questions within 72 hours. If you think it might take you longer or that you are planning a long weekend, then let the coach know by-when not later than (NLT) you will post a complete reply.

If you start and decide to take a week or longer recess then we say that whatever came up for you was a positive effect of the tutorial and our conversations. When you come back you will have to re-register for another 30 days.

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philosophy

What is the philosophy?

The philosophy supports personal responsibility—open, honest, and spontaneous communication, keeping ones agreements and telling the truth. This is sometimes referred to as "operating from impeccable integrity." The communication model used supports communicating through to mutual satisfaction. "I think you're ugly" may be one's truth but for most it would not feel good to hear, except by request with express permission.

The education process is referred to as Discovery Learning. The premise being, you already know the content of the tutorial. The tutorial merely brings (and keeps) what you know to the front of your mind at a time when you are intent of having truths work. The tutorial also examines beliefs and understandings held to be truths which are not.

The process is not therapeutic; it's not about getting better or analyzing behaviors. The process is educational, and, you may find yourself feeling as though you're "getting better."

The process is non denominational and non secular; however the experience of communication, of being gotten and acknowledged, is described by most as a spiritual experience.

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