My part in it

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SnowBlind

My part in it

Post by SnowBlind » Fri Aug 27, 2004 2:11 pm

I just want to say that while reading some of the letters posted, I realize my part in this whole mess. Some say I did all I could. While he denies it, I know he "picked" me out of the crowd cuz he knew he could pull the crap he did (lies, deceit, cons). He thinks he's gooood! Thank you for this site. It really opened my eyes. I just don't know how I can do anything about ME!

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Kerry
Posts: 422
Joined: Sat Aug 31, 2002 8:01 pm

Re: My part in it

Post by Kerry » Fri Aug 27, 2004 5:31 pm

Hi Snowblind.n n Close, but as far from a responsible communication as would be the sentence, he's to blame for everything. I refer to your unconscious use of the word "part." Responsibility is 100%. When you take responsibility, there's none left for him to take.n n Re: "Some say I did all I could." Very powerful of you, creating people who will buy into your belief that part of the problem is him. Whomever you caused to say this has themselves an issue for which they have yet to accept responsibility.n n Re: "While he denies it..." This is what's called a covert blame statement. Depending upon how powerful you're willing to be it could also be said, "While I cause/intend for him to deny it...." n n Re: "I know he "picked" me out of the crowd," Another covert blame statement. You invalidate your own power. The more powerful place to come from is to acknowledge that you set it up for him to come up to you. It was a psychic hex (communication, unconscious intention) kind of thing. Unbeknownst to him he had no choice. You can never complete a relationship that you did not create.n n Re: "he knew he could pull the crap he did (lies, deceit, cons)." Nope. A responsible statement would be, "I conned him into lying and deceiving me, so that I could finally see myself, and get that I've been a con all these years." Cons always attract cons. n n Re: "I just don't know how I can do anything about ME!" You're on the right path. Keep up the good work. Use The Clearing Process, five days in a row, and then post your experiences of doing it here afterwards. Tips: 1) Read each page (including all hyperlinks) before your first post, the examples etc. 2) Type until you're truly exhausted. 3) Do not try to communicate to me in your clearing as I am unable to comment on such subject matter here. I wear a different hat when I get clearings—a bit like a priest, if you will. "Getting another's communication" means getting it and doing nothing with it.n n Thank you for the acknowledgment.n n Kerry

SnowBlind

Re: My part in it

Post by SnowBlind » Wed Nov 24, 2004 12:10 pm

Sorry Kerry. I won't take any responsibility for the "abuse" of a narcissistic, anti-social, psychopath. It's taken me many months to realize this is what he is... NOT just an abuser. There is NO communicating with him. He's perfect and the whole world is off kilter. He will not even consider that he's a gaslighting, pathological liar and a crook. Despite the fact that there is no violent criminal history (he's a second striker!), he's as violent as they come. However, his violence isn't physical or he'd go back to prison for life. What more can I say? I'm working on ME now! Thanksn Snow

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Kerry
Posts: 422
Joined: Sat Aug 31, 2002 8:01 pm

Re: My part in it

Post by Kerry » Wed Nov 24, 2004 5:49 pm

Hi SnowBlind: (such a perfect username)n n As you can see your position shuts down communication between us. There's simply no space for communication to take place. You're right, I'm wrong. The cost for being right will continue to be your aliveness (your energy and creativity), eventually your health.n n Perhaps the most valuable advice I have for you, and other readers, is; never ever remain in a converation with someone addicted to blaming, someone unwilling to communicate from cause, from responsibility.n n Please do not post/reply here again until you have completed 50 hours of therapy/counseling, to do so would further reveal your addiction to abusing and being abused, to make-wrong, to getting in the last word (blow) so as to be right. Resist the urge to compose a knee-jerk angry reply, choose to be with your experience. Remember it's your karma that brought him, and now me, into your life. Eventually you will have to acknowledge that you brought him into your life to mirror you. As Pogo says, "We have met the enemy and he is us." As Kerry says, "Compassion is knowing the evil ain't out there."n n At some time down the road it will work for you to make a donation, it will acknowledge, anchor, the value of our conversation. n n With aloha,n n Kerry

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