Community Communications

Hi SnowBlind: (such a perfect username)n n As you can see your position shuts down communication between us. There's simply no space for communication to take place. You're right, I'm wrong. The cost for being right will continue to be your aliveness (your energy and creativity), eventually your hea...

Hi Lily: Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I'd add one more Lilyism to your list; don't engage in a substantive conversations with someone who is addicted to lecturing, to being right, and to arguing. As with all posts here someone will see themselves through our communications. If you wish a rep...

Hi Snowblind.n n Close, but as far from a responsible communication as would be the sentence, he's to blame for everything. I refer to your unconscious use of the word "part." Responsibility is 100%. When you take responsibility, there's none left for him to take.n n Re: "Some say I did all I could....

This question was submitted anonymously on 4/17/04 via our Spouse Abuse Tutorial "Frequently Asked Questions Form." It was sent again, with an edit, so it's clear that the submitter is sincerely concerned and would like an answer.n n Question:n n 1) Does someone with a parolee have to be search if t...

Hi Charity:n n The bottom-line answer to your question: “How can i help a friend in an abusive realationship?” [sic] is, you can’t, not with your present communication skills. However, that’s not a very satisfying answer. It’s not what you thought you wanted/needed to hear.n n Your friend is mirrori...

Hi Santafaded: Please resend your acknowledgment to my "instructions" e-mail. In my email I asked for you to reply with "Nothing in the body of the e-mail." Your reply contained two communications, a stationary icon and an advertisement. Also, please do another test post here per my instructions, "I...

Hi Zumra: Our policy is to not engage in conversations via email. This forum, the Message Drop, is for comments and feedback. There's something about your concern that's uncomfortable. It sounds as though you have a specific question, if so, please use the Message Board. If what you've read already ...

Hi JustMe:n n Thank you for acknowledging receipt of my e-mail. I got that you were experiencing confusion.n n So that others can follow what you are referring to, re: "I received your e-mail." here's the e-mail.n n ===================n Hi JustMe:n n We received your "Links are working" communicatio...

Hi Molly:n n Thanks for the assurances.n n I have e-mailed you the particulars.n n Kerryn Tutorial Coach

Hi Lisa: Thank you for reaching out. You have done a commendable job of describing what bothers you. I’m not clear why you chose to post here. I say this because it does not appear that you have read any of our tutorial descriptions or our Dear Gabby letters. Would you please explain what prompted y...

Hi Web: Thanks for your prompt response. Special thanks for your support of the integrity required to optimize the tutorial. Please feel free to continue another time. You are released from your agreement. With aloha, Kerry, Tutorial Coach PS. If you wish you may post a specific concern (question) h...

Wendy: When someone asks you to not communicate with them (specifically the way you have been trained, using your abusive communication model) and you do, it’s tantamount to date rape. n n You communicated:n n Yah, Kerry, I know you don’t want to hear from me again but tough luck. What I have to say...

Hi Wendy:n n Your reply did not feel good. Such a communication is abusive. To ask for advice and then arrogantly announce your intention to ignore it is exactly what “mother” has been doing her entire life and will do with you. She is mirroring your own addiction to abuse (see definition of abuse )...

Hi Wendy: The short answer, which could upset you, is, there is nothing you can do or say that will bring about a transformation. In the consulting profession it’s a given that "helping" merely postpones, in this case, the mother doing what it takes to heal herself. If you and I intervene it just ad...

Hi Dee:n n Here’s a copy of the e-mail you were sent after you submitted your agreement.n n Your agreement was not accepted because you did not follow the instructions. As stated below, the tutorial only works for those willing and able to follow instructions. Your post reveals that not only were yo...